Understanding intimacy and intimacy gender differences is crucial if you are to have loving, caring and respectful relationships.
With the stress that comes with the typical modern day fast-paced lifestyle, relationships have become increasingly more challenging.
Intimacy love gender – these three words are all related, and knowing how the opposite sex tends to feel and act can help tremendously in creating and maintaining healthy relationships.
Better understanding intimacy gender diferences and our partner will allow us to respond in ways that are more loving and caring, while at the same time being more meaningful and fulfilling for both of us.
Use your better understanding of intimacy gender differences to change your APPROACH to relating to your partner – instead of trying to change your partner and becoming frustrated when it doesn’t happen.
Since women and men are attracted to each other in different stages with different timing, misunderstanding the other person’s interests and intentions can result in frustration for one or the other or both.
Attraction to another person can be considered in these four ways and stages – emotional, mental, physical and spiritual.
Intimacy gender differences #1…
One of the intimacy gender differences occurs with the kind of initial attraction that happens. Women are initially attracted to a man in the mental attraction way.
It happens in her mind. She finds him interesting and likes the way he does one or more things. It may be the way he smiles, how he writes, how he speaks to another person, or the success he has made professionally.
There will be quite a few men that a woman can be attracted to in this way in the first stage.
Men, on the other hand, are initially attracted to a woman in the physical way. He will especially like certain physical features about her – her hair, her breasts, her legs, her body shape or how she walks, for example.
Not to be mistaken for feelings of affection, this first stage of attraction for a man can be felt for quite a few women. This first stage of attraction for women and men is one of the more significant intimacy gender differences.
Intimacy gender differences #2…
Women moving into the second stage are attracted to a man emotionally because of his personality. She may be attracted to him because he is funny and entertaining. He may be the quiet and more serious type, or he could be a take-charge kind of man.
If a woman knows herself, she’ll know what kinds of personalities she will tend to prefer and enjoy the most.
A man moving into the second stage of attraction will also be attracted to a woman emotionally because of her personality. While the man might be the playful type, he may be attracted to a more serious woman. He could be a shy person who’s attracted to a bolder, more confident woman.
It’s been said that opposites attract – that can be true. We DO tend to be attracted to a woman or man that is NOT like we are.
Intimacy gender differences #3…
Another of the intimacy gender differences occurs once a woman has been attracted to a man mentally and emotionally. She can now begin to move into the third stage which is physical attraction.
Being physically near the man, touching, holding and kissing are all very pleasurable for a woman that has experienced the first two stages of attraction.
The third stage for a man will be to become mentally attracted to the woman that he’s been physically and emotionally attracted to. Not only does he enjoy touching her physically and her friendship and company, he now wants to know who she really is.
Certain aspects of her character will be intriguing to him – her kindness, her generosity, her maturity or confidence or openness and so on.
Intimacy gender differences #4…
If a woman has experienced the first three stages of attraction, she’s able to reach stage four – spiritual attraction. She now can fall in love with this man. Having been through the mental, emotional and physical attraction stages, spiritual attraction can now happen.
It’s possible that there may be several men she would feel are lovable. In her heart, though, she’ll begin to realize and come to know that HE is the man that she is meant to be with.
For the man who has gone through the first three stages of attraction – physical, emotional and mental – he too can now be open to falling in love with this woman. He too can feel that there may be several women that are lovable, but deep inside – he knows SHE is the right woman for him.
Intimacy gender differences #5…
Another of the intimacy gender differences is related to emotional needs. A woman is happiest and most fulfilled when she feels her needs are being met by her partner. At the top of the list of needs for a woman is that she needs to feel that she is being listened to and heard by her partner.
And often, men don’t realize that women communicate differently than men. For example, when she’s expressing her frustration about an issue, by trying to offer or provide solutions to the woman’s issue instead of truly listening and being empathetic, a man actually frustrates the woman even more…one of the vital intimacy gender differences.
By learning to really listen to what a woman is feeling, a man can show the woman that he cares, respects, and understands her. She needs reassurance so that she knows she’s really loved. She needs to know that she really IS #1 in his life – even more important than work or sports, for example.
On the other hand, a man feels the best when he feels he is meeting the needs of the woman, also one of the vital intimacy gender differences.
At the top of the list for a man is his desire to be needed by the woman. Men fear being incompetent or not good enough. Achieving success in life is crucial for a man, including with his relationship. Men need to know that their woman really needs them, that their woman appreciates them – what he tries to do and what he provides.
He needs to feel admired by the woman in his life – his strength, his humor, his kindness or his abilities. He also needs to feel that she accepts him without trying to change him. Even though both know he’s not perfect, the responsibility to become better is his, and she accepts that.
When he feels her appreciation and acceptance, it becomes easier to give her the empathy and understanding so necessary to her. And when she feels she can openly express what she feels, she feels understood and is able to give him the appreciation and acceptance he needs….
…and as both learn how to support the other in meaningful ways, the relationship begins to become easier, more enjoyable and more fulfilling. Understanding intimacy love gender differences is vital for healthy relationships.
Like to see and read more? Select any of the links below that interest you…
Read more about intimacy gender differences – and creating lasting love, see this wonderful relationship guide by John Gray.
Gray tackles the hard and often messy business of finding “a soul mate.”
Without fear or favor, Mars and Venus on a Date dissects the dynamics between women and men and the five stages each relationship must pass through: attraction, uncertainty, exclusivity, intimacy, and finally, engagement (for marriage, of course).
Even though Mars and Venus on a Date isn’t The Rules by a long shot, the courtship it describes is surprisingly old-fashioned. It’s chock-full of things your mother might say – “Most people find or are found by their soul mates when they are not really even looking.”
The author advises partners how to achieve sexual satisfaction without frustrating each other, how to rekindle and maintain sexual passion without resorting to affairs, how to talk about sexual needs without turning each other off and much more.
For those in a rush to the bedroom, virtually every paragraph is recapitulated in boldface one-liners. Although some of the material is old news (women require more foreplay and affection than men), much is cutting-edge.
For example, women don’t always desire orgasm, and therefore “quickies” can be enjoyable for both parties. You’ll laugh and learn from this informative book on intimacy gender differences in the bedroom.